Another Milestone!

Izzy brought me a BOB book today, Dot, and wanted help reading. Well, she managed about 80% on her own and we were both thrilled! She is well on her way now.

To celebrate reading her first book, mommy's birthday on Monday (and the fact that we are in the final stages of kitchen disaster - the backsplash went up yesterday) we walked across the street to Swiss Chalet.

My baby is growing up.

Free-Range Mama in Training

Izzy wasn't feeling well this morning so my hectic Tuesday turned into a very relaxing day. I spent some time reading some articles on sites that I haven't been to in a while. One of them was FreeRangeKids and it reminded me of a recent situation.

I signed Izzy back up for dance at the Y. They have a pretty terrific schedule during the week. In theory, I could drop Izzy off for 45 minutes of dance and then a volunteer would come collect her from the studio and bring her (and the other kids) to the big gym to play for an hour. Alternately, Alex spends 45 minutes in the gym and then can come to dance for an hour. Now Izzy is still coping with some separation anxiety so I have to stay for dance and we skip gym altogether - hence the leaving her in theory part.

Last time we were there we were running in a bit late. I took both kids to the dance room to make sure Izzy was on time. Then I was struck with a dilemma. I couldn't leave her while I signed Alex in at the other side of the building and taking her with us defeated the purpose of running in to get her there on time. I looked at Alex and asked him if he was okay getting himself there. Sure! He was thrilled. Heck, he was half was out the door without me before I even asked.

I gave him his card and told him to ask the guy with the clipboard (the one we parents use to sign our kids in and out) to hold it for him. Then away he went.

As I sat watching Izzy I started asking myself, will I get in trouble for sending him without signing him in? Did he make it there alright? Did he tell the supervisor why his negligent mother wasn't there to drop him off? I could see the exit from where I was sitting in Izzy's room and started noticing how busy the place was. I saw that he could have easily slipped passed me and out the front door. Then years of exposure to CNN and Law and Order started these niggling little thoughts that were hard to quash. The what ifs... We all know what they are. The usual horror and fear about kidnapping and molestation. So this bad thought would pop into my head, my heart would race a little and I began fidgeting in my seat. Then I would reason it right back out. Sure, something bad could have be happening but it was extremely unlikely. I kept resisting the urge to grab Izzy and run down the hall just to make sure he was okay.

My boy will be 7 in a couple of weeks. He is pretty tall for his age. Looks much older. I trust him. In general, I trust humanity too. It is humbling though - this feeling of not being in control.

At the end of dance class, this very large, male volunteer coach came into the room with Alex and a few other kids. The boy was red-faced, sweaty and grinning like a fool. He had just spent the past 45 minutes running and playing. It was no big deal for him. This "incident" at the Y seemed out of the ordinary to me. A moment I will probably remember for a very long time. If it happens again though, I will be much more relaxed. I have learned that the hard part is trusting everything to be okay. When it is okay then the next time it gets easier.

Fear. It is the most insidious predator parents face. Unfortunately I feel it is a battle I will be fighting for a very long time.

Reading

I feel like Izzy is right on the cusp of reading. What is so interesting to me is how differently it is happening for her, at least, compared to Alex.

Alex was pre-reading for quite a while. It started around 2 1/2 and since his dad was beginning to read at that age, it was sort of expected. Not that we thought he had to read that early. Just that a boy who isn't even 2 having full sentence conversations with you and being able to express his feeling and frustrations through words sets the bar pretty high. It really didn't take until 3 1/2 but around his 4th birthday he graduated to the Magic Tree House books and never looked back.

I didn't teach Alex to read. I read to him, of course, be he gets all the credit. I remember bits and pieces of how it came together. There was the constant asking about what that sign said and what that paper said. He was relentless for a while and I couldn't wait to get past that phase. One of the first signs he read on his own was "The Beer Store". Too funny! We usually buy all our liquor from the LCBO (a government run liquor store - you can only buy booze in Ontario at those two places or small wine outlets run by the vineyards) so it was funny that it happened on one of those rare trips. I spent what felt like a long time right on the edge of waiting for it to happen. It wasn't gradual like I assumed it would be. It was like a flood gate that had opened. Someone recommended that I show him some Calvin and Hobbes, which he loved, and that induced him to read on his own.

Basically Alex went from asking me what it said to reading it back to me. I wish I knew if or what the middle step was but I don't. He watched a lot of the Leap Frog dvds on reading and letters but that was about it. I also own early reader books but didn't pull them out for him until it was too late to use them as learning tools.

Now I have Izzy and we are getting to the part where she asks, often, what this or that says. That is pretty much where the similarities end though. She is a kid who will only take life at her pace. She won't be prodded along even with level one princess books to entice her. No, she comes to me with the early readers and tells me what we are to work on together.

I see a system coming into play. She loves to write and will sit beside me for hours asking how to spell words. She has memorized quite a few of them now. I think she is breaking these words apart (by knowing what they are at first) and is now beginning to apply some of the rules to words she sees written elsewhere.

There is something methodical about this girl. She doesn't do things by accident and works until she achieves perfection. I get a kick out of seeing her learn through spelling. Especially since Alex could read so well and is only now catching up to his grade level in spelling. She will be a fantastic speller. Izzy reminds me a lot of myself at her age. I was a champion speller in school - winning end of year prizes. I also have a hard time moving on to other sentences until I feel the one I just wrote is up to snuff. That free-form writing was agony for me. There are a lot of similarities between the two of us.

It really is fascinating, watching their little brains go through these processes. They never do what I expect of them. I think she will be reading before her 5th birthday.